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Black Lion Weapon Giveaway!

April 7, 2014 - 4:27pm -- Lee B.
Black Lion Weapon Giveaway!

It’s been awhile since we’ve had a giveaway on the Hub and it seems like we are well due to have something big and something fun. Today we are glad to announce that we are going to be giving away three Black Lion Claim Tickets, thirty gold and thirty unidentified dyes. These items will be split up between the top three as follows:

  • First Place will get Three Black Lion Claim Tickets. That means you tell me what you want to get out of the Black Lion Weapon Vendor up to the cost of Three Black Lion Claim Tickets. I get these for you and mail them straight to you!
  • Second Place will get Thirty gold.
  • Third Place will get Thirty Unidentified Dyes.

So. How are winners chosen? Contestants will need to do two things: Provide a screenshot of some silly moment in Guild Wars 2 and then tell us a story about that same silly moment. Maybe you have a screenshot of a dozen quaggans standing around a cow? Tell us a little made-up story of why quaggans are summoning forth a Super Quaggan! Do you have a glitched pose screenshot and a funny story about that same moment that you had with guildies or team mates? It can literally be anything! So long as you have a screenshot and an amusing story to go with it!

All contestants need to submit a comment below with a screenshot and your story. We highly encourage you to use Imgur to host their pictures for ease of use but any host is allowed. Stories need to be PG-13. Keep it classy guys. The deadline of the giveaway will be on April 14th at 8 PM PST and winners will be announced and contacted on April 18th! Get these in ASAP!

You can also keep an eye at @CanadasMathlete or @TenTonHammer on Twitter for all news surrounding the giveaway and anything related to Guild Wars 2

Kiel Derping So Hard

I just love this picture so much. I wish we could have those facial expressions.

SZSSZS
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The Humbling Laugh

It wasn't much long ago when I was minding my own business in the borderlands. Dailies and other nuisances on my mind. Rather astonishingly, a pig began laughing and pointing at me. I left the camp and asked why the rudeness?

The pig gave no reply.

I took out my trusty wrench and gave a menacing look.

The pig gave no reply.

Three minutes now of uninterrupted laughing. My patience was wearing thin. I threw all pride away, got on my knees and begged for an answer.

The pig gave no reply.

Though at least now he had ceased laughing. For the next few days I continued to follow him around, repeating my question now and again. I needed to know! On the third day, the pig gave a loud grunt. And faced westward, for three hours. I knew it was a sign! I ventured far across lakes and land to find a camp all too similar. 

There however, something far more astonishing. The pig himself! The same exact pig! 

It was then I realized that, he'd been laughing not only at myself, but all Asura. In our vain and crude attempts at travel and transport, this pig had long mastered the art. A simple creature, yet more advanced than all Asura. Master of Statics, Dynamics, Synergetics, a picture to hang in each hall.

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"...so this Sylvari walks up to the Captain and says ' I'd like to join your crew ' and the captain says 'Sorry but we can't have any leeks on board!' ". A rumble of laughter irrupts across the tavern.


"Is this what you do all day? Drink and laugh at others and then drink some more?"

Silence hangs in the air. The human noble looked around the room with an icy glare of contempt until one of the drunken Norns spoke up.

"You're either mighty brave or might stupid human...which one is it?"

"I'm sober!" the human scoffed.

"Listen here you..." the Norn slammed his mug of ale down on the bar and clambered to his feet.

"If you want trouble, you've got it! I could take you on with one eye closed and..."

The human raised her weapon and interrupted.

"Alright you inebriated lump...lets go!" she turned and started to walked outside, inviting the Norn to join her as one of the other patrons shouted out.. "There's 12 of him and one of you!"

The rowdy crowd jeered and laughed once more. The human noble muttered under her breathe "12 of him, psh, these fools are so drunk they are seeing more than double"

The Norn staggered outside and attempted to unsheathe his sword, grasping at the handle but failing to find it.

"Bear with me human!" the Norn chuckled.

The human rolled her eyes and lowered her weapon and then suddenly...

"HA...KA...BAM!"

(Image Link)

Within seconds, the human is downed. Left feeling shocked and highly embarrassed. The small crowd of onlookers burst with laughter.

"Ahaha bear with me!"

"I told you there was 12!"

"She thought it was a bear-faced lie! Ahaha!"

Eventually the laughter and mockery subsides and the crowd return to their drinks, leaving the human with nothing but her dented pride for company.

To this day, the human noble is not sure how the drunken Norn did it. And so goes the story of Magnor Twelve Bear.

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Norn man-baby liked toys.

Norn man-baby's favourite toys were his wooden sword and wooden dagger. 

Norn man-baby liked to play in the snow, high in the mountains above the icy waters. 

Norn man-baby would often get into a lot of trouble whilst out playing high in the mountains in the snow with his wooden sword and wooden dagger. 

Norn man-baby once got caught by his parents whilst out playing high in the mountains in the snow above the icy waters with his wooden sword and wooden dagger. 

Norn man-baby did not like getting caught by his parents whilst out playing high in the mountains in the snow above the icy waters with his wooden sword and wooden dagger, so he took off his clothes and had a tantrum. 

Norn man-baby does not think you would like to see him when he has a tantrum. 

Norn man-baby is right. 

[Image link]

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